Getting Started

Okay, so several people have asked me why I don't start a blog. Here we go...not really sure what to write, but I'm sure I'll come up with something along the way.

Here's the latest - I'm currently 14 weeks along in my pregnancy, and a total emotional train wreck. That sounds really bad, but it's the only way I know to describe it. A lot of you already know the story, but for those of you who don't, I had a major meltdown Sunday night.

Here's what happened:

Brian and I went to the movies and left Gehrig at his Granny and Grandpa's house (Brian's parents). The movie lasted longer than expected, and it was nearly 9:30 p.m. before we picked him up. On the way home, I was telling Gehrig that we were going to get our jammies on when we got home and get in the bed. Of course, he said, "Milk." It was then that Brian mentioned the fact that we probably should start weaning him off his nighttime cup, or at least giving it to him earlier. I totally agree - I don't want him wetting the bed when we start potty training. But the more I thought about it, the more upset I got. When we finally got home and I put Gehrig down for the night, I absolutely lost it. I was crying hysterically. Brian was just looking at me like I was crazy, and at that point I felt like I was. The nighttime cup of milk is "our" time. It's the only time, other than when he's sick or Brian spanks him that he'll actually sit in my lap and cuddle. I'm not ready to give that up yet. So, I told this to Brian. Then I proceeded to say, "I don't want to potty train him, either. I love changing his diapers. I want to hold him like a little baby again. I don't want him to grow up." And poor Brian, all he could do was go to bed. There was nothing anybody could say to make me feel better at that point. I went into Gehrig's room and picked him up out of his crib (he was already asleep) and rocked him for a while. Then I got in the bed and cried myself to sleep.

The next day I was fine. Brian and I talked about it, and I couldn't help but laugh. It's very hard to see your baby growing up. Sometimes I'm afraid that he won't need me anymore. But I'm learning that he'll always need me in some way, just not for the baby stuff. Gehrig is growing into the neatest little man. He has such a great sense of humor and is really a well-behaved child. I guess no matter how old he gets, he'll always be "Mama's boy". Soon enough I'll be able to experience all the baby stuff again. I'll be praying Gehrig out of his diapers by then :)